Do you know when people ask you, why didn’t you ask this person out? So that question lingers in my mind, and I think of your name each time they ask. So,
That was weird.
I thought of you as this one ugly person I’d ever met.
We entangled ourselves in a way no one would ever understand.
And never I’d thought of your name to be written in my score list.
A jerk, you said to me every time.
The heartless bastard, each night you call me.
Stupid, when I throw my lame jokes.
Things get even weirder.
My loneliness has become critical, as if I was in a complete lockdown for years.
And I know I have these people around me, my phone rings like an endless alarm.
Yet still, those are the craziest moments I never understood, sometimes things work really funny.
I’d check on you each time I miss that one banter, or just simply you,
for being you,
for talking to me,
for caring about me,
for staying with me.
Universe told me more, here comes the weirdo!
I thought of myself,
after everything that we went through.
What makes it so hard to say?
That I want you here by my side?
That I know you are the perfect one for me?
That I want you to check on me everyday?
That I don’t want other people to fill out my position?
That I should be your ‘secret menu’?
Or,
That I love you?
Perhaps because feelings are suck,
And humans are designed to work weirdly, again.
Oh, here is a note. Take a shot each time I say the word “weird” again, will you?
It was so easy for me to do it.
To say what’s remaining on the tip of my tongue,
to say that I will ask you out, to make you mine.
But the universe jinxed us so badly, they don’t want the general love story like your classic favourite Disney princesses. I have to wait, until God knows when, for my feelings to grow. And you, too, have to see, to answer all the doubt within yourself, that I might be a handful for you.
And do you really want to ruin us?
To lose what we have right now?
Hey, Love,
You know everything that I’ve told you,
And my feelings for you are drawn very well,
No scratches, no sketches,
And all those batters and bruises,
The blood that I bleed,
The scars that’s wounding my pride,
We’re going to be a two different mess together,
And do you think the universe is ready for that?
Nah, we’re better on our own.
Before it gets tenfold weirder,
I am glad to say that I am your best friend,
That I remain your favourite boy to this day.
Expect me to love you more day by day,
and expect me to break your heart another day.
Do we make a good amendment here?
I love you,
in a way that no one will ever understand.
